Chapter 0: The Gospel According to Darkside Johnny | Sermon on the Blunt Series

 Sermon on the Blunt

Darkside Johnny

Chapter 0: The Gospel According to Darkside Johnny

"I didn’t choose the dark. I was called into it."

It was 2011, and the storm had already started to whisper.

Not outside — in me.

You ever feel it before it hits? That shadow curling on the edges of your spirit? Like thunder inside your ribcage and a pressure in your bones?

I knew something was coming.

A storm — not of rain, but of darkness.

The kind of darkness that doesn’t just cover your eyes... it digs into your soul.

I thought maybe I’d messed up.

Asked God, “Did I sin too deep? Get too high? Listen to Zeppelin too loud on a Sunday?”

I’m a sinner — I won’t lie about that.

I love sex, drugs, and Rock N Roll. Still do — just with more soul than shame now.

(These days I’ve trimmed it down to weed, coffee, and kratom. That’s my holy trinity. No guilt — just grounding.)

But back then, I didn’t know what was going on.

So I asked the only one who really knows anything:

God.

And He didn’t condemn me.

Didn’t strike me down or send fire from the sky.

He invited me.

Just like He did Peter, the fisherman.

“Drop your net,” Jesus said, “I’ll make you a fisher of men.”

Same energy — different setting.

Only this time, the voice said:

“There are lost souls in the darkness.

I need someone to go in.

Someone who won’t flinch at shadows.

Someone who knows the terrain.

Will you go?”

And I had a choice.

I could say no.

Could hide in addiction, drown in comfort, numb it all and blame the world.

But I knew where that path led.

I’d seen the dungeon. I’d danced with it.

It doesn’t care if you cry pretty — it just wants your soul sedated.

So I said yes.

Not because I was brave — but because I couldn’t stomach another meaningless descent.

If I was gonna suffer, it was gonna mean something.

And I asked Him one more thing:

“If I’m going into the dark... do I get a name?”

He smiled —

like a father handing his kid a guitar.

“Darkside Johnny.”

“Searching the depths of darkness in search of lost souls.”

That was the mission.

That was the vibe.

That was the calling.

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I ain’t here to preach at you.

I’m here to stand with you —

in the fog, the fall, the failing light.

I’m not better than you. Just been in the dark long enough to see that the light doesn’t always shine —

sometimes, it smolders.

And sometimes, that’s enough to lead somebody home.

So this ain’t a gospel for the perfect.

It’s for the almosts.

The stuck.

The ones who burned their wings trying to be someone else.

Welcome to the blunt-side scriptures.

This is Chapter 0.